They plague our people at every turn, but from this day out, they shall plague us no more

Call it what you will: a recession, downturn or slowdown, it’s not good. But, the fact that banks are taking it in the teeth brings me nothing but joy.

Countrywide being bought of by BoA. Good, that’s one less bank polluting the earth.

Citigroup posting $9.83 billion loss. Outstanding. Serves them right.

Merrill Lynch’s stock down. Needs to drop more.

Banks are like Azkaban, Azkabanks to be more accurate, and for the most part, those who think they’re important and run banks are like Dementors. You can insert VP, SVP, EVP or a title such as Senior Manager in place of Dementor and it still means the same:

“Dementors are among the foulest creatures that walk this earth. They infest the darkest, filthiest places, they glory in decay and despair, they drain peace, hope, and happiness out of the air around them. […] Get too near a Dementor and every good feeling, every happy memory will be sucked out of you. If it can, the Dementor will feed on you long enough to reduce you to something like itself … soul-less and evil. You will be left with nothing but the worst experiences of your life.”

For those who are laid off from their respective banks jobs (and hate said bank job), to paraphrase Fight Club: “Tomorrow will be the most beautiful day of their lives. Their breakfasts will taste better than any meal you and I have ever tasted.”

~ by isolemnlysweariamuptonogood on January 15, 2008.